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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 23
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 23 |
Cathy, I appreciate you writing me back. You are probably right about them wanting you to do one or the other. It's so funny b/c everyone I've talked to suggests that we do sometime different. It's so confusing!! My husband and I just thought we'd start the adoption process just in case we talk to Dr. Bick & he says "there's nothing I can do for you". Does that make any sense?? I have one friend that used the adoption facilitator that we're using and she suggested to hold off on the adoption thing...Lenore suggested that we keep on & see where it leads us...my parents have their opinion...You've been through it and suggest to wait...ugh...wish the answer was a little clearer!! I can see both sides. (can you tell I'm a little torn about it??) I really do appreciate your response...I appreciate you taking the time to care, too! <img src="http://www.asklenore.com/ubbthreads/images/icons/wink.gif" alt="" /> Candace
DH Kelly
Dogs-Kaycee & Cody
Stillbirth @37 wks, 2 m/c @8 wks,12 wks
Waiting to get matched
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Anonymous
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Anonymous
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Candace,
We had had severl m/c and then pursued our son's adoption in Peru when I was only in my 20's. He was (and still is)
so active, that we had to wait until he was six before we started IVF, so he would be in school during the day.
After 4 tries, no luck,,,now...we are pursuing another adoption. We did it in reverse. Most people seem to try fertlity tx first, then adopt, we were opposite. In hind site,
I wish we had exhausted all fertility tx's first, then adopted two,,boom boom, one right after the other OR both at the same time..so our kids would be closer in age. Now our kids are going to be 11 years apart. We have been trying to adopt a second child for almost three years, so it has just worked out that way.
You carried all the way to 37 weeks. I am still thinking if they induced or did a c-section earlier you would be ok,,if the cause is maybe the placenta starting to deteriorate early?
What I am saying is you have no problems getting pregnant, I would see what Dr. Bick says first. We adopted first, then did the tx's and I wish we had done it the other way. If we had exhausted all means of carrying a child etc..then,,,after the tx's don't work,,I recommend counseling to every couple...then after time,,and after people resolve their fertility issues (you never totally get over the loss of not having a bio child, but adoption does make you a parent, and that is what is most important),,then go on and adopt.
It sounds like you are still trying to have a bio child. I would pursue this now. We kept trying until we finally had to say,,enough is enough,,,you will know when you get to that point and it is time to adopt. We wish you all the best, please let us know what the good Dr. Bick has to say, and take care of yourself... Cathy
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 23
member
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 23 |
Cathy,
Thanks so much for all your input. My husband & I will continuously talk about, but I think for right now we want to just keep getting as much info as possible. I just found out that my insurance my not cover much (if any) of the tests Dr. Bick will be doing...that could easily cost $6k...SO...we're going to have to discuss it. Like I said, I would love to have my own bio kids, but also don't want to liquidate our savings. My dh & I feel like we have so much love to give...bio child or adopted child. I will keep yall posted.
Candace
DH Kelly
Dogs-Kaycee & Cody
Stillbirth @37 wks, 2 m/c @8 wks,12 wks
Waiting to get matched
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