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As Kalli suggested, I'm starting a new thread to continue our discussion. To see how it started go to http://www.asklenore.info/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=9119&page=1#Post9119So Kalli... I had that hesitation too, about bf a baby that might return to his biologic parents. That's why I didn't do much preparation, I hesitated until the last minute! But when we were presented with the case, we knew there was no chance that he would go back. The mother is homeless, have had another child remove from her care. She had left him in the hospital, the day after she gave birth, and never saw him again. It was a perfect case for us, for me, for bf! At 4 months, bottlefed since day 2, he still had the reflex to search for the breast when I was holding him! It was like he was asking me to breastfeed him! I couldn't say no, of course!
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Jalx~
Of course you couldn't say no!!! I'm so glad your baby was persistant! Your story gives me hope that I'll be able to nurse a baby that might be older than a newborn. My husband and I always kidded that with the next one, we'd "order" a 3 month old b/c they'd already be sleeping better at that point. Well, with foster and foster-to-adopt...you just never know. I am glad to know that a baby's instinct to nurse is still strong at 4 months!
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Thats great! I hope your nursing goes well.
Adoptive mommy to 4 , Last 2 adopted nursed. Youngest nursed till she was 5! Raising 2 grandbabies, as infants they were raised on donor breast milk 
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I guess, I am in a different situation. I have not told any of my family or friends that I am planning to breastfeed. I am not ashamed of it, I just don't think it is any of their business right now. I know that my family will probably have to know but for right now it is mine and my supportive husband's secret. What is everyone's experience with telling family etc and how did you do it? Did they support you?
Thanks so much!
Karen
Karen
Mommy to Christopher(VN)
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Some have supported and some have not. But really - it wasn't any different than with my bio children. My mother thinks its "silly" when there is formula, my sister thinks its too much "work", my grandmother thinks its good "as long as the baby is gaining ok". I didn't get any different comments 6 years ago when I was pregnant and talking about nursing my daughter... or during the months I nursed her.
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KK I kind of felt like you at first. But then I realised that most peoples reaction was "I didn't know you could do that?" So suddenly I had an opportunity to educate people. I have had friends refer friends to me who are adopting because they have said "I know a woman who brought in milk and breastfed her adopted daughter" I didn't tell our birthmom directly but we knew her and she knew I would want to breastfeed. So it came up and I said yes that is my plan. I didn't nurse in the hospital with her. We didn't have that kind of relationship and I didn't want her to be uncomfortable. Or for me to fumble with the lact-aid in front of people. But I did nurse within 36 hours of my DD's birth. In fact it was the first thing I did when I brought her into our hotel room. I think it depends on your situation and how comfortable you feel with the birthmom. Obviously the sooner baby gets to breast the better. People will know when they see you do it. Expect them to be amazed. KK Aren't you adopting an older baby internationally? So you will just come back from overseas nursing a baby. Your family will know then if you choose not to tell them before.
Laurie~Craig's wife~Mom to 4 blessings nurtured at the breast CJ(24)Travis(21)Beka~adopted(9)Rab(6)
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Yes, I understand what you mean... at first I told only the people I knew would be supportive, I didn't want to have to justify my choice. I knew my mother would think its to much work...! And, most of all, I wanted to be sure to succeed before having to face criticism. I felt all my energy was needed somewhere else! I needed to stay positive, I didn't want to get discouraged by negative people.
But now that it's a fact, I'm not afraid to tell anyone. I'm rather proud of what we have accomplished! And I want people to know it's possible to breasfeed an adopted baby - even if it's not a newborn.
And, Nona, the nursing goes very well! My baby is exclusively bfed since December (7 months), he is now a very healthy and chubby one year old! He just started walking, and still nurses 4 times a day.
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Joined: Apr 2003
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Jalx that is what I mean. You put it into words better than me. Congrats on your successful breastfeeding relationship.
Laurie~Craig's wife~Mom to 4 blessings nurtured at the breast CJ(24)Travis(21)Beka~adopted(9)Rab(6)
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Jalx ~ Thanks for re-starting the thread! This is great, and I'm getting SO much info!!!
I'm thinking from what I've figured out right now that telling the bmom will depend on our relationship and wherther the topic comes up or not. If it doesn't come up, or it doesn't feel right to say anything, I won't and I'll just bf as quickly as possible!
As far as family and friends...my family is awesomely supportive. My mom bf five babies for about a year each back when formula was the "thing" to do, so shes great support. My sister has two girls and wanted to bf them, she just wasn't prepared to stick it through the initial rough couple of weeks. And i have several friends who have bf their babies and are amazingly supportive. Now, Dh's family won't know...his mom gave him formula and is still saying that I might get "lucky and have a baby that sleeps through the night right away like he did" Not likely, cause I'm not pumping my baby full of formula!!!
I think I'm feeling like you did, Jalx...I only want support, not judgement. I'm excited about this and don't want anyone to burst my bubble, ya know?!
GREAT discussion, gals!!
OOh...one more question...how did you all deal with going back to work and pumping? What were the reactions at work? Not that I really care what their reaction is, I'm doing it so they need to deal, but I'm just curious...
1year on regular protocol.
Nursing/pumping for one month for our sweet girl!!
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YES!!! That is fantastic! I am so so happy for you. Keep up the good nursing
Adoptive mommy to 4 , Last 2 adopted nursed. Youngest nursed till she was 5! Raising 2 grandbabies, as infants they were raised on donor breast milk
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